Going through a divorce can be an exhausting, grief-filled process. In the midst of this major life-change, you are expected to make big decisions that will impact your future, and the futures of your children. We always encourage our clients to be rigorous about self-care during their case, to support good decision-making throughout the process.

 

  1. Individual counseling – Counseling helps us manage our own behavior during a crisis. Establish a safe place to share frustrations, concerns, identify and repair old wounds, and examine one’s own needs!
  2. Personal support network – Surround yourself with people who care about you (who are not going to add to the conflict themselves)! Ask for help when you need it – with the kids, with home repairs, with little tasks. People are often looking for a way to help you, so take advantage of it!
  3. Be kind to yourself – Recognize that the stress of a divorce actually lowers one’s IQ scores (don’t worry, it comes back). Don’t be surprised if you find yourself forgetting things or not thinking clearly. Cut yourself some slack. Pampering yourself falls under this category as well!
  4. Support Groups – Consider joining a support group focused on divorce in your area. Or consider other types of groups, centered around activities you enjoy (book club, hiking groups, etc.).
  5. Healthy lifestyle – Eat well, exercise regularly, get good sleep! Feeling well supports your mental health. Take a walk, look at the stars, take a day trip to the coast, read a book.
  6. Choose to be private – Having to explain to everyone “what happened” can be exhausting in itself, or make you feel defensive. It’s ok to say “It’s complicated, let’s talk about something else.”
  7. Let your lawyer handle the legal aspects. A good legal team can relieve a great deal of stress and allow you to focus on taking care of yourself.